A Golden Heartbeat..

Its a memory that does not bother my soul tormented..

these days quite a bit..

yet it sometimes echoes..

with a mirage of hope..

never to be real

amidst all this  insanious loneliness..

and a mirror of many wasted efforts..

and bottles crashed..

and ashes poisonous…

it no longer ever comes..

and deluges over my scarred soul…

like rains benevolent after a thousand years of drought..

in love and tears of respect…

yet it is there..

with that mysterious & musky fragrance of spring..

when the earth smiled wild with the dance of the sacred lotuses..

and the forests of oaks and spruces aged..

swung without any shame with passions abandon…

it was a time where abstractions where cherished..

and even taints got their desired courtesy…

and silence its deserving credits..

it was time when even the cold iron…

and the beaten down aluminium …

spoke to me in a billion tunes..

and a million colors..

and the sun was not a strange outsider then..

as it has become now in these times of bitterness chilly..

rather a close and joyous intimate…

enlightening up my rotted veins…

with warmth of laughter endless..

it was when i felt free..

to fly away like a astronaut blessed..

into the distant galaxies of wisdom…

it was when i felt appreciated…

by your platinum breaths…

it was when i felt in harmony…

with your ethereal rhythm of those delicate golden heartbeats..

of your ever infinite soul…

but you cut me away from your spiritual connection..

throwing me down over the stairs of disappointments..

like some plastic can…

ready to be reused..

recycled.. or forever erased..

as some case of misplaced identity…

you intentionally dissected me..

from your passionate consciousness…

you …

with some absurd manipulation..

and some pious effort…

pulled the latch on me..

and shut me out..

from your much desired closet..

of precious miracles…

and wiped out all signs..

of my feeble protest…

with an attitude..

fit for the Emperors of hell…

so now i  no longer feel..

the forgotten asymmetries of the universe..

nor find joy …

in those much miraculous eclipses….

nor any rhythm..

in the ceaseless bass of construction…

for i search for that elusive frequency …

where those golden heartbeats of yours..

are still broadcasted…

for public consumption…

and private relief….

and i hope you don’t mind..

if i purchase off some of it…

through some petty things of glamorous significance..

for it you only…

my much adored sweetheart once…

who opined over some burning roses..

that your love..

and your time…

is not worth my cheap chocolates…

or tardy verses…

but that your thoughts of amber..

so sweet..

so delusional…

deserve all that is there…

to choose in caviar, silk  and diamonds…

Now i have become the emperor..

of all that is to survey…

and i demand to cage off your golden heartbeats..

at least as payments..

for all that debts, beatdowns,...

shocks, and pain…

that your abrupt cut off..

cost me..

and will always cost me..

for the rest of eternity…

or else…

i would deserve…

a rapid absolution..

into a different realm..

of actions and consequences..

where golden heartbeats of souls blissful..

come for free…

as an absolute right of existence..

My thoughts..

A message to all those..
who have broken my heart..
and left me all alone...
they underestimated my conscience..
they thought i will always be lead...
they will soon realize..what a big mistake ..
my hellland india made..


hope you like it dear Susy...:-))